Wednesday, June 30, 2010

The last year I was me

I remember being in elementary school and thinking I'm glad to be here. I loved my friends, I had friends, I talked to everyone, I got along with pretty much everyone. For five years my class stayed pretty much the same. Every year we would maybe loose one kid and get one new kid. My class of about twenty five kids stayed together. The other four classes of kids in my grade didn't like to talk to us, because to them we were weird because we were smart. I remember hearing the other kids talking about us saying that we were lame and losers because we were learning more then them and more advanced, to them we were just a class full of geeks and nerds. I never really understood the kids outside of my class. They were so mean to each other and to us. Always wanting to fight with us. My class might of been ahead school and learning wise but towards the end of fifth grade i realized that we were behinde in maturing. Maybe mature isn't the right thing to call them, but the other kids all cared about how they looked what kind of makeup they were wearing and who was dating who. Before I saw how the other kids were acting I loved myself, i didn't care what other people thought of me , and i think that's because everyone in my class liked me, I wasn't afraid to do something crazy like make dumb faces and mess up my hair, or make a town out of rocks (which became very popular at my school), or play with the boys whether that was tackle football, basketball, kickball or even murder ball. Quick side note, murder ball was a game my class played where two teams would stand on either sides of a soccer goal and throw balls at each other, its really like dodge ball except you could do things like chains and go past the line and other things. But the reason we started playing was because during soccer a boy kicked the ball from the goal and it hit me right in the face, to he then let me throw a ball at his face. Everyone was there for each other we were a family. It wasn't till the end of fifth grade were i began to doubt myself, I soon realized that I didn't like who i was. The last day of school after promotion everyone was going to stay in class till the day was over so we could have one last day together, even though all but four of us were going to the same school. I don't remember why but i just wanting to leave, I didn't want to be there and i didn't want people to see me.

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Tuesday, June 29, 2010


I guess when people make blogs they have on title , but since I can not make decisions my blogs name will keep changing probably till I am done writing one. I yes i realized that my URL had my old tile but i will just have to overlook that.

Home Alone

So for the first time ever I have been left home alone. My mom was teasing me saying this is what its going be like when we kick you out and you have to do everything for yourself. So far I can't wait to be kicked out. Really its not that bad. Not bad at all. The thing I love the most is that I get to go to bed when i want to. At both my mom's and dad's house the amount of hours i get to sleep a week depend on how much I'm getting along with the other people in the house. If we're on bad terms I can pretty much expect to sleep with two pillows on my head curled into a ball trying to block out as much sound and light as possible. But not this week although i might sound like a fifty year old woman, I went to bed at eight o'clock last night. I made my own food which should last me at least two more days so overall i think I am good. The only thing is of course like a little girl i get scared at night. Really the last thing my mom said to me was "oh did you know that last week someone broke into that orange house down the street, they even kicked their dogs because they were barking" Wow really that's the mental image she left me with. Oh and of course my dad keeps texting me, his words of worry, well make sure the doors are locked. Thanks dad nice to see you have some fatherly instincts in you. But for some reason hes worried about me now, but doesn't care about me when he goes out Friday, Sat and Sun till three o'clock in the morning and then brings someone random girl home. Well its good to say that from my parents I learn how not to live.

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